So, this happened.

It happened about a week ago, to be specific, but I hesitated on posting about it because I didn't want to come across like a nut. But, I have given in to the temptation to write about it, because it keeps nagging at me and if nothing else it may give you horror and paranormal writers some inspiration.

I have had quite a number of inexplicable things happen to me over the years, but I wrote most of them off as 'weird, but not definite proof of anything specific'. I'm not a 100% closed-minded person by any means and believe in a wide range of spiritual concepts, but I lean towards a healthy dose of skepticism. It keeps an imaginative person like yours truly balanced.

I have seen UFOs, but at a distance -- not close enough to prove them as, yes, definitely a giant alien spacecraft hovering on my front yard, complete with little green men peering curiously at this lower life form. I have heard the sound of someone invisible loudly clapping their hands beside me (even ghosts think I'm awesome!), and had an invisible force shove my leg hard enough to move me sideways, but one cannot definitely prove those things as not being bizarre hallucinations. The only proven odd experience (one which I had a second reliable witness with me at the time of, who observed the same phenomena) I have had is seeing blinding white flashes of light indoors in my room, as if someone had just pressed the flash down on a camera. Now, I am one of those freaky hermits that sits in their room with their blinds closed and curtains drawn most of the day (the sun creates glare on my laptop screen, hiss), so this definitely was not caused by anything outside the room.

But, whatever, right? Maybe I just have some really enthusiastic static going on in there. My presence is electrifying, even to dust.

All of these experiences seemed isolated and benign and never took up much of my conscious thought, which I have mostly devoted to other deeply important things, like Skyrim and memorizing which stores sell the plain kind of Fritos, not just barbeque. Then last week, I had a dream.

In the dream, some kind of entity shifted form, between several people I was close to in the past, who frankly treated me rather horribly and then abandoned me like the happy-go-lucky, soul-sucking leeches they are. When I figured out I was in a dream (something I almost always do -- I know, in my dreams, that I am dreaming. I figure it out, have a full conscious awareness, and even the ability to CHANGE my dreams if I don't like them. My head is my own personal Choose Your Own Adventure novel, you guys), the entity felt 'caught', and tried to flee. I chased it to a closet. When I opened the door to the closet it had shut itself in, before me stood a seven foot tall, red and black demonic... Thing. Which then attacked me. I fought back, and it retreated. I woke up. I thought damn, that was weird, but it was just a dream. And I moved on with the rest of my day.

The following night, I was up late, as is my habit. I was at my bestie's place and we were sitting on our computers. The cat was asleep beside me. All the windows and doors were closed up for the night. The house was still.

Suddenly, we hear an enormous crash. The clock on the kitchen wall, which must weigh 3-5 pounds, has flown across the house, more or less. A good 15 feet. I am not exaggerating this. The nail on which it hung is still perfectly stuck in the wall. The clock seems to have crashed against the fridge on the opposite side of the kitchen, ricocheted, and broken, at precisely 3:33 am, for no readily apparent reason. This clock had previously hung on its wall without an issue for years.

Well, that's odd. I didn't let it get to me, though, mainly because I was too lazy to be freaked out enough to go home or even go upstairs. I shrug and go back to the internet (priorities are priorities, after all). This, my dear readers, is why horror is the one genre I simply cannot write. Can you imagine it? "Just at the moment the terrifying apparition appears and the windows begin to rattle as if shaken by the distant thunders of hell, our hero sees something really interesting on Tumblr..."

Yeah, that one isn't going to work out for me.

As I browse the net like the alarmingly complacent social media junkie I am, my bestie says to me, "It's really odd the clock stopped at exactly 333. In chaos magic that's the number of a major demon." Curious, I look it up. Yep, he's right. According to chaos magic (which I don't know much about, so don't ask me how credible it is, but I tend to treat all religious beliefs as equally credible), it's the number associated with a major demon who is apparently known for changing form frequently, and attacking people before staging mock retreats, as if luring them into the false notion they can beat him. Well, looks like the weird cake just got its icing, kids.

Fortunately, I am pleased to report that I haven't yet started speaking in tongues, crosses haven't started vanishing from houses I enter, the walls aren't bleeding, and basically nothing too spooky has happened since. I am guessing that he didn't enjoy all the hours of browsing for humorous pictures of cats.